Oh Obama with a B...

A post on February 25, 2007...events occurred January 16, 2007.

Like many people in Austin that day, I was holed up all day in front of the tube (due to the weather,) when Barack OBama filed his paperwork to form a presidential exploratory committee.
I was reading, blogging, etc. and I kept hearing in the background..."OSama this and OSama that."
As I have a cunning ability to block out anything that I want, Osama was not something that peaked my interest that day. I had other things on my mind, I think Shitney Spears had barfed on Issac Cohen and I really wanted to see that shit.

Plus I kept thinking back to my dream of myself and a group of really cool little people... we were all naked in Whole Foods and totally partying in the produce isle. Mini Me was there and he was humping my calf by the organic butter lettuce. And we were in this really new cool grocery store, you know the kinds with the mist and the jungle sound effects. So it was hot, but it was just a stupid dream. I would never let Mini Me hump my calf. Come on. People can't help what they dream, I always tell myself that. Letting Mini Me hump the shit out of me probably just makes me subconsciously a really good person. Thats really NICE of me. Just like it was nice of me to let that man feel me up in the nursing home when I was Christmas caroling. I was just getting in the spirit of the freakin season and the old man starring at my tits the whole time he gummed his stupid banana. I knew his day wasn't looking up. So I allowed it to happen. I did not force him, I kept telling the cops that. Whatever. It's not like I was giving it up, I was giving it back.
Anyway, it was a freaking dream. Gosh!



So I had a lot on my mind. And after like the tenth time of hearing (this is what I am hearing in my head) "OSama is running on a democratic ticket"...Then came the Epiphany.


I turned to my very well informed friend, who led me this 12 hour cnn marathon.
"Okay so your telling me, that 4 years ago we couldn't 'smoke him' out of his caves, like Yosimite Sam (aka George Bush) had promised.
He has WMD, (not to be confused with DWM-Divorced White Male, it happens to me often.) No I am talking WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION. And the dude is filing paper work and raising money to run for presidency?"
"Ya, we are right on. We can not even get this dude when he's filing his shit?"

Why did I have to figure this out?

He looked over at me and said, OBama with a B.

Whatever.