Namibians are thanking God, y'all!

It was previously reported that Britney Spears was preparing to travel to Namibia to spit out her next booboo. It seemed that the privacy Angelina Jolie and the Jolie-Pitt familia received while in Africa inspired Britney to seek out the same type of refuge.
But Namibia didn't want her skank ass having her booboo's (translates to children in "country,") in Africa.
The community got together rallying against her arrival. Women savegely ripped their own uterus from their bodies and burned them in defense! Marijuana growers burned their crops in protest against K-Fed's arrival. Farmer's began hoarding crops at the thought of Britney eating through small villages. Local musicans torched themselves in flames with the mere thought of K-Fed and Britney's music!

Britney's rep. later reported the couple had no plans to relocate to Africa, the story was untrue.